Why I don’t have goals. 

Squad goals. Relationship goals. Hair goals. Life goals. Body goals.
Goals. Goals. Goals. Goals. Goals.

If you’re on any social media platform- you’ll recognize this term.

Now, I’m not saying that having a goal is bad. But, there is a fine line between using a goal to motivate you to better yourself in a healthy way, or to make you look at your own life in an unhealthy way– enter, comparison.
I think it is safe to say that we all know that social media is mostly a look into people’s lives in their best moments. You don’t see the behind-the-screens of their daily lives. And honestly, in the social media world dominated with filters and photoshop, most of the time, the bests aren’t always “truly” their best, if you get what I’m saying. Sometimes they are– and that is magical!
So, when you set unrealistic goals or compare yourself to that which is unrealistic, you are setting yourself up for failure. Not only that- but the second you compare yourself to someone else- you strip away layers of love for yourself.

Because when you want “something” someone else has (which I’m pretty sure is against God’s will, so nothing good will come from that)–

whether it be a relationship– marriage– body physique– hair — money– whatever.

You discredit what you do have. Little by little, you will begin to not only focus on the things about yourself that you don’t like, or don’t have, bc you’re giving too much focus and energy on what you like about someone or something else.
Think about it– when something goes really great, (Yay!!) — you want to share it, right?!

5 seconds later, that might not be the case. Let me humor you for a sec… I know I’m not the only one who changes the second they walk through the door, right? I mean I don’t care how long it took me to pick out my outfit… Or get ready, it’s coming off the second I get home. So if I would post a picture where I’m actually dressed, with makeup on, and hair done, that does not mean that as a stay at home momma, this is happening everyday. Or all day, for that matter, bc that would be unrealistic (for me). I’m talking, do not judge someone’s social media to your actual life. Someone who keeps a clean house, or at least in the social media world, is probably struggling with some other part of their life… Or, get this– they struggle with the need to always keep a tidy house! Ha, I laugh, but it’s real. Like, for real. I live it. But, someone is blessed with the natural gift of tidiness– maybe they are struggling with something else… patience, cooking, self worth… The list goes on.. Regardless, focus on your gifts, not theirs….

What gifts do you have? Dig deep…. I know they’re in there!!!
Think about this—-

Only you can be the best you– that’s right- YOU!!! In case you didn’t get that.

No one else can be you better, and you cannot be anybody else better than they can be themselves. So, let you be you- and everyone else, themselves.
You were made to be unique, you have your own special gifts, talents, characteristics. You were created with a purpose– but you can be sure you won’t find it trying to be someone else. Back to that purpose… No one else can fulfill that purpose better than you. Think about that– let it sink in….. Isn’t that incredible??
So, please. Do not try to change yourself to be like someone else. If you need to change– like a bad habit, addiction, negative body image, motivation….anything.

I have a few suggestions that may help:
1. Step back!! Take a social media detox. Take that time to focus on YOU, and all of your worth, bc it’s there. You have worth.
2. Stop and think… If I have, or achieve _________ , will I truly be happy? Keyword: truly – not artificial or temporary happiness, I’m talking happiness you can feel in your bones. If not– let it go!!! Ask yourself what will help you achieve that happy-to-the-bones? Go after it!!!
3. Focus on YOU! For every comparison or negative thing you entertain- come back with 5 positives- 5 things you have, chances are someone else is praying for those.
You’ll learn to appreciate your unfiltered, raw, life. It may not always be perfect and get the most “likes”. But it’s yours, and that is what matters.
I want to hear from you– what are some ways that help you, or have helped you overcome any of these obstacles?

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